I'll always be on hiatus... since I'm entering college, majoring in multimed design #finally :megustaplz:
Long I haven't been here, quiet touched by the interface, how I have been here... for so long (well at least moar than 2 years....) and how I used to be so naiive bout art.
U see for me, who learnt sketching for 5 years straight, sketching work often get praised. Including at college (but i got a mad ass buddy with skill racing to mine). The fact that I entered school, I now realized that design and art are two COMPELTELY different things which are related. In design u work fast, efficient, and good. In art you work slow, graceful, meaningful, and marvelous. After I realized that, I feel like being betrayed. It's not like I had my 5 years training for nothing or just in order to be a step ahead in college, but somehow I feel like I can't feel the enjoyment of art anymore.
Now I really... really... really
First this happened to me on my second week of drawing class. My lecturer realized the change of mood in my strokes. He said, they were .... horrible (iguesshewassayingthatinasoftway). And he tried to encourage me, but it didn't work to tell you the truth. I feel like breaking down and cry everyday. My works getting worse day by day. I still do good, but he always said (recently) "I know you can do better." and he was true. I can do better .... with faster speed... with complete dedication. But this wound left hasn't healed. I feel like being jerked to a swamp and couldn't get back. This is just so tedious to me. Everyday i feel like I'm being stripped off naked by his critiques against my works. the more he pointed it out... the more I feel like... I'm no good for this shit.
It's not like I don't like him pointing my turn backs.... but It's just driving me mad. I miss those times when I work carefree-ly.... when I don't use my mind... when I can forget about the world and just ... draw (usually the more I'm absorbed in my piece, the better they will be; weird isn't it?). I don't know till when this will continue
So far college is fun..... my friends... new friends... old friend.... no cute boys whatever.... more occupied time... thicker eyebags (they're dangling like dog's balls recently). Ill try posting my works at college here when I have time.... you will actually laugh at the worst ones.... they're just mad!
anw I made a blogspot for my college works we all were told to do so
in the future I might change my account name to that... let's see If i can... cheers!
oh oh oh btw, my daughta started cosplaying~~~ so happy la~~~